I did this with my iPod touch, and I feel cool.

A Song

Mood: For once, nothing.

Quote: "I thought about Hassan's dream, the one about us swimming in the lake. There is no monster, he'd said, just water. Except he'd been wrong about that. There was a monster in the lake. It had grabbed Hassan by the ankles, dragged him to the murky bottom. I was the monster." -The Kite Runner (pg. 86)

Blog: I'm currently engaged in writing a song on my guitar. Its not amazing, the guitar part is really pretty, but I'm having difficulty witht he lyrics. I read The Kite Runner in two days (yesterday and today), and its really good. It started me thinking about making my guitar song about redemption, and maybe with a little love thrown in. This is what I have so far:

Be Right

You see his face in the mirror
Looking back into your eyes
All your sins and wasted sorry's
Staring with the stony eyes
(And) all you want is to undo it
Go back into the light

Time does not change
Time cannot change
Time must stay the same
Time must stay the same

The pain haunts through the day
Only comes out in the night
Your pillow's wet another day
Trying to make it right
The pain is in you
You can't make it right

Change for me
Change it now
Loose the binding
Chains from hell

I called you yesterday
To hear a voice not yours
I would crawl to find a way
I would make you right

Redemption is pain
Felt to make things right
Please, Please
Please let us be right

Clouds

Mood: Sufjan Stevens
Quote: "God is love. Love is blind. Ray Charles is blind. Ray Charles is God."-Anonymous Graffiti (I found this in my AP Psych book).

Things I want for Christmas:

1. Love
2. A girlfriend that meets the aforementioned requirements (sorry to those of you who are not 26ers).
3. A Wii
4. No homework (yeah right)
5. The newest Zits treasury (Alternative Zits)

Thats just some of the awesome things I put.

Blog: ***This is my naturalist essay I wrote for English, I thought it was pretty good***

I stared at the sky. The endless, near infinite, expanse of gray-blue that makes one feel small. On this quiet September afternoon I pondered the objects in the sky. There are many of them; shirts left on a dirty floor, white on top, a dusted gray on bottom. They float, snowballs filled with helium, like opaque balloons that refuse to come down. They are the little wonders we call clouds.
Clouds, like any other thing in nature, must be observed long enough for one to notice their magnificence. A cloud is not one organism but a conglomerate of numerous individuals each attempting to blend in. Each hulking herd moves slowly, lumbering past other members of its race without a wave hello or a slight nod. Each cloud-herd dwells in complete isolation from those outside it. Each herd passes without knowledge, self-obsessed with how it looks externally, whether it is fluffy, shaped correctly and so on. “Are we white enough?” cloudlings wonder, “Are you with them because I know I’m with you, and if I’m with you and you are with the rest, then I must be with the rest.” So the cloudlings continue to fuss, focused on the trivial logic of being together, so focused on the mass.
On a rare occasion, however, I noticed a cloudling break free of its invisible bonds, a small wisp in the middle of giant herds, floating in a sea of blue. This individual cloudling lasted for a second before it was consumed by another mass. Then another wisp would break free, only to be absorbed by a separate collective entity. Then a thousand wisps broke free, “I am me, not all of you,” they say as they collide to form the mass of I-am-me-not-all-of-you.
So I see it is with society. We wander the vast expanse of life so consumed with our own appearance and involvement that we are completely ignorant of someone else a hair’s breadth away. We lumber, all of us, part of a living mass, a collective conscience. Then, on rare occasion we assert our individuality. “I am an individual!” we exclaim proudly, “I am not a clone!” and then we break free like a wisp in the sky, only to be reabsorbed by another mass. “I am a reject,” one says. Each “reject” wisp then congregates to form a mass of “rejects”. So it appears when a group of “individuals” who go against “societal norms” dress the same. They dress different than myself, but the exact same as their comrades.
It is then I realize, underneath the clouds, that we are never truly individuals. We can reject, accept, or change whatever we would like and for a moment we may be individuals. Then, in a blink of an eye, we realize that once again we are the same as those around us. So when someone says to me, “At least I am original.” I often think of clouds.

I'll Be Deep and Profound Later

Mood: Ghetto Gospel

Quote: "The nicest thing about standards is there are so many to choose from."-Andres S. Tannebaum

Videos you should listen to:

• Ghetto Gospel (Tupac ft. Elton John) : http://youtube.com/watch?v=jsHkuWanobE
• Come thou Fount (Sufjan Stevens) : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b1bSlS6OWTs
• Where'd You Go (Fort Minor) : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KN4wNKEwzEY

Blog: Let me be deep later. I'll post my essay (which I like) later. I'll do a lot of things later, just let me be normal. I'll be thoughtful tomorrow, deep the day after. Today I want to be unthoughtful and totally shallow.

A couple people have been saying that I won't get a girlfriend because I'm too picky. This is true, although some myths, such as that my significant other needs to be a model and a genious are untrue. I will create the list, to verify all the questions, and dispel (and prove) assumptions and thoughts that one would have about myself, and my standards.

So it begins. The list. In no particular order, but some can be modified.

1. Sense of humor-whats the point if she doesn't laugh?
2. Inteligent-geniuses (or geni) are scary, but a little brain in the ol' noggin never hurt anyone. Your head is supposed to store more than air.
3. Likes my friends-yes, even the retarded ones. Especially my nerdy ones.
4. Relaxed-likes to chill and not worry about anything.
5. Not controlling-lets me be me and doesn't automatically assume things that are completely ridiculous.
6. Has a cell phone-I found that it helps, having had many relationships vicariously through my friends.
7. Appreciates silence-when conversation dies away, its ok. Enjoys the quiet times by herself.
8. Open-will talk about what needs to be talked about, doesn't hide things.
9. Knows a little about video games-understands basic concepts (such as they system should be turned off when switching games on a Nintendo 64 etc.)
10. Likes herself-its no fun having to constantly reassure the person in question they are pretty or something like that.
11. Adventurous (so not spelt right)-likes to try new things.
12. Enjoys food-eats good food, likes sushi and other exotic dishes.
13. Has common sense-eliminates (or greatly reduces) the occurance of "Are you kidding me?" moments.
14. Doesn't limit-Never uses "I'm blonde" or "Thats just how I am" as an excuse. Doesn't classify herself.
15. Knows about music-pretty self-explanatory.
16. Good-looking-good-looking to me and tries to keep herself looking nicely.
17. Self-confident-not arrogant. Accepts when she is wrong, knows when she is right.
18. Doesn't have a personal bubble- maybe not as extreme as me, but not a compulsive three foot box person.
19. Fun-likes to put herself out there, likes to have fun. Doesn't mind looking stupid at a friend's house.
20. Not embarrassed by me
21. Excepts me-odds are, I'm not really going to change, much.
22. Understands-knows when its time to be serious, and when to joke.
23. Enjoys being with me-doesn't care if we're just hittin' it up on the couch or partying with some friends. Likes the fact that I'm there
24. Independent-Doesn't mind doing different things from time to time. Lets me go off on my own and fully capable of doing the aforementioned by hereself.
25. Accepts Life-knows that somethings don't change, and some do.
26. Doesn't do drugs
27. Inquisitive-asks questions and likes to learn
28. Thinks learning is more important than a GPA
29. Appreciates the little things-a raindrop. a walk, sunshine. Likes the nice things that usually go unnoticed.
30. Liked by my friends and family-not really all that good if noone else likes you.
31. Doesn't get offended-if I do something stupid lets it go, if someone says something offensive, forgets about it.

Being a supermodel would help too. So there you go. I'm picky, may I never stop being so.

A Pleasant Suprise

Mood: Ministry of Magic (nerdy wizardrock band Samuel showed me)

Quote: "Families are like fudge - mostly sweet with a few nuts." ~Author Unknown

I've been really lucky on this trip:

1. There were no lines!!!!!!! (Yet, I still have to fly home)
2. I haven't made my cousin cry.
3. I finished Ender's Game, and I will finish 1984.
4. I met a way cool guy.
5. I had a good dinner (that wasn't really lucky, I knew it would be good).
6. I totally fell in love with the Wii (but I still like the Xbox 360, the internal struggle is so intense).

Movie Review:

Dan In Real Life- Finally. Finally. Finally, I saw it. Finally. It was awesome. Relatively intelligent humor, Steve Carrell is better than he is in the office. There isn't any sex or naughty things like that and its clean basically. You just have to see it. 4.5/5 stars

Blog: Tomorrow I leave North Carolina to arrive at my home. Strangely, North Carolina (or rather the area I'm in in it) is home to a world famous whitewater park. Who would have thought? So of course, being the wannabe whitewater junkie that I am, I took a lesson with my Dad. It was really fun even though its like 50 something outside and the water was 50 degrees. I totally lost feeling in my hands, but it was awesome. I'm probably coming back next summer to for a week to do some more lessons, then I will hopefully be able to go on a couple weekend trips with some friends. I'll even break the rules and let some girls go if they want (naughty, well, kinda naughty).

Here are a few quotes from my cousins."

• " why do you have lots of zits on your face?"-Carly (she's a young lass)
• " why do you have red dots on your face?"-Ethan (a younger lad)
• To me: "You're wierd" To Ethan: "No I'm not" To me: "Yeah you are and your farts smelt so bad, woowee, do you remember that?" To Ethan: "I'm not weird, and my farts still smell bad."-Conversation with Ethan, he's five.
• "Are you wearing a bra?"-Ethan to a younger cousin of mine (who I think is like 10 or 11)
• "He has two cowlicks. That's freaky, its like two eyes in the back of his head. Ethan, are you an alien?"-My Dad
• "You have chubby cheeks, its like fat and stuff."-Ethan to my Dad
• "I'm gonna leave here with a complex." -The Dadman
• Ethan: "Mommy does your brain ever stop talking to you?" My Aunt:"What kind of things is your brain saying to you?" (He meant thinking) Me:"Kill the wench."
• "He spelt my name and I felt cool, then my mom reminded me that my name was his last name so I felt significanly less cool." Me to my uncle

Thats my vacation in a nutshell. Its been suprisingly good.

Thanksgiving to the World

Mood: Augustana

Quote: "A good traveler has no fixed plans, and is not intent on arriving." -Lao Tzu

If I were at home for Thanksgiving:

1. I wouldn't have to worry about lines in airports.


2. I wouldn't be in my dad's office


3. My mom wouldn't have had to give the same talk to my dad and I about being social and not complaining.


4. I would be playing Halo 3 tonight


5. I would be just getting out of school.

Blog: Yes, I am doing the worst thing one can do on Thanksgiving weekend, travelling. My mother says I should be a tigger instead of an eeyore. So here is my positive outlook:

• I get to fly six hours and wait in forever long lines in airports!


• I get to go make one of my cousins cry (not on purpose, I'm just too witty)!


• I get to go to North Carolina!


• I don't know why I would be excited about that one!


• I get an awesome Thanksgiving Dinner!

I am sarcastic about all of the aforementioned (I totally love that word) things except for the last one. So to the weary Thanksgiving Travelling Warrior and to those who feel left out because they are staying home. Happy Thanksgiving Weekend!!!!!!!!

May you enjoy your lines (or lack thereof).

A Poem

Mood: Whatever

Blog:

Wandering
Watching
Wishing
Waiting

Gossip on the right
Giggles on the left
Fake smiles
False joy

They pass
I sit

Waiting
Watching
Wishing

I was once them
Flanked by friends
Now alone
Atteneded by air
Damned to despair

Searching for a friend
Silent prayers
Wishing for a stranger
Waiting for a friend
Still I sit

Waiting
Watching
Wishing

Up and down
Here and there
Materialize
Become real

Become true
Speak
Think
Become real
Still I go

Wandering
Waiting
Wishing

Forced smiles
Feighned delight
Dissolution
Once again

Waiting
Wishing

No place to wander
So I sit
Praying
Pleading

And still no one